New Anarkali – the Love Story Continues

Love stories are as old as the human race. Every part and every culture on the planet has some epic tales about these. Here in the sub-continent, we have many tales of love and betrayal but no other tale attracts as much attention and heartache as the story of Anarkali and the Prince Salim. Almost 4 centuries ago, King Akbar the Great was on the throne of the Kingdom of India. Prince Salim was his son and hence, the Crown Prince. He fell in love with one of the chamber-maids, Anarkali.  But the King did not approve of their love. The Prince was adamant and he even rebelled and a war was fought between the father and son. Anarkali was house arrested and the Prince surrendered on the condition that the life of Anarkali would be saved. The King, according to some accounts, set free and exiled her, while some says she was killed. Nobody knows for sure the real story. And some even challenge the whole story as untrue. But never the less, it is been told for centuries now and we in Lahore even have a bazaar, probably the busiest bazaar of the city, named after her, the Anarkali Bazaar. And then it has extended to form a new bazaar, New Anarkali. But imagine if this love story takes place in the modern setting, in this age of modern technology? Here, I tried to portray a scene from this epic tale.

King Akbar the Great is sitting in his palace. Maan Singh, his Chief of Army, is sitting beside him. The King has just signed out from his Account-e-Aaam (Facebook account for the common citizens).

King Akbar: (Taking a big bite from his Big Mac) I am happy America didn’t default.

Maan Singh: Sire, I didn’t know my lord was interested in world’s economy.

KA: Well, I was a bit worried about my little change in those numbered accounts in Swss banks.

MS: I agree sire.

KA: (Taking another mouthful) Do you think I look more handsome in 3-piece suit?

MS: With regular gym, yes sire.

KA: I do go to gym regularly!

MS: Three visits in 4 years, including the inauguration!

KA: Whatever!

The King plays the latest episode of Coke Studio. Taan Sen feat Stereo Nation.

Mujhe raat ko neend na aye, 

Ke teeri pal pal yaad sataye,

Tu sun le WAPDA…

(After a long pause, while logging in to his Account-e-Khas (Facebook account for the Elites of his government), turning towards Maan Singh.

King Akbar: Have not seen of Sheikho (Prince Salim) lately. What is the matter with him?

Maan Singh: Sire, he may be busy with his routine stuff.

KA: He even does not bother to comment on my Facebook status!

MS: Well, sire, the point is that he may be, actually…

KA: You are hiding something from me. Come to the point. I want the truth.

MS: In that case, I must tell that the Prince is busy reading the blogs of Anarkali and both of them talk daily for hours on their cell phones.

KA: What? How is it possible? Mobile phone talk-time is so much expensive and I did not find any irregularity in his Bank Statements.

MS: Sire, the Prince and the Maid are using Ufone Ghanta (hourly) Package.

KA: Ghanta Package?

MS: Means one can talk for 1 hour for 4 rupees.

KA: But our official carrier is Airtel and Maharani Jodha (Grand Queen Jodha) SMSes him on his Airtel number.

MS: Sire, the Prince is using a dual-sim phone.

KA: Dual-Sim! Yes off course.

The King returns to his screen and when he saw on his wall this status message of his son, Prince Salim, he is dumbfounded.

The King swivels his laptop towards Maan Singh so that he too can see the conversation.

KA: what they meant by “asman pe ajan”? how can they go to the sky?

MS: Sire, asman=sky, they meant Skype, the video chat software.

KA: But how can he use it with his limited internet connection?

MS: My Lord, the Prince has subscribed to the PTCL Student Broadband Package.

KA: But Sheikho is not a student. He graduated 3 years ago from Oxford Dictionary.

MS: Sire, Oxford University. Yes he did try but still have some courses to pass. So he is still regarded as a student, officially.

KA: And does the Prince know that Facebook policy prevents users from sharing their passwords with anyone?

MS: Sire, the Prince thinks that he and Anarkali are one.

King Akbar locates the blog page of Anarkali and in a little while, hacks her password. The King is of the opinion that it is the blog that has poisoned the Prince. Suddenly it dawns upon the King that he is no longer able to access his Facebook account. He receives a text from an unknown Ufone number:

Your Facebook account is hacked. If you want to take it back, give me the password of Anarkali’s Blog.

Sheikho.

The King is furious. Maharani (grand-queen) Jodha enters the Palace. Both men stop talking.

Maharani Jodha: Aalam Panah, I wish Amit get Anjali and marry her.

King Akbar: Maan Singh! Make the necessary arrangements for the wedding.

(Maan Singh, confused, is about to ask something but Maharani Jodha interrupts)

MJ: Sire, I was talking about the new drama serial, "Kahani 100 saal ki (Story of a 100 years)" !

KA: Serial?

MJ: Yes the new serial on Star Plus. Tonight will be the 721^st episode.

KA: New indeed!

MJ: Please tell WAPDA to make sure there is no power outage at that time.

KA: But there is no outage in the palace!

MJ: I am worried about the outage at Cablewalas place.

KA: Okay.

MJ: (as if remembering something suddenly) I want you to gift me a new Saari. The same design as that of Begum Nawazish Ali.

KA: Maharani Jodha! You are worrying about saaris? Look what your son has done! (tellling her the details).

MJ: But what is so worrying about it?

KA: I have posted our wedding pictures on my Facebook too.

MJ: So?

KA: (whispering) well, do you remember I am grinning like a complete idiot in one of those pictures with you!

MJ: I will talk to Anarkali.

The King and the Queen convince Anarkali to delete her blog and never ever create a new one for the sake of the Kingdom. Fearing for Prince’s life, Anarkali agrees. The King SMS her's blog password to the Prince and he in return sent the King’s Facebook password. The King and the Queen are looking at their wedding pictures and smiling. Anarkali deletes her blog forever. The Prince is still searching everyday and googling her blog but it is nowhere to be found.

(DISCLAIMER: The idea for this post was given by Fatima. If you like it, the credit is mine because she only gave the idea and I wrote it, but if you don't like, then you should criticize her, because I only wrote, and the idea is all that matters  :P )




As an afterthought, I would post the link to a brilliant video which portrays all the characters of the original story. King Akbar, Maan Singh, Anarkali and Prince Salim are clearly portrayed along with the original story. Hope it make things more clear.